Yawn... Yawn... Zzzzzz...

Found this on web -- Obviously taken on a day that isn't her Birthday!  

It's almost time for me to fill up my sippy cup & grab my snuggle bunny (glass of water & my hubby) but before I do - let's catch up. After watching Bethenny Frankel (Bethenny Ever After) celebrate her 40th birthday on Bravo last night, I can't help but feel comforted by her craziness. Throughout the show I found myself saying - "oh my god - me too!" Especially the scene where Bethenny is comforting Cookie (her dog) in her closet. Excuse me, I meant where Cookie is COMFORTING her!!!  It was so wonderful to know that we aren't alone in our crazy brains. I know it
must sound mean but by no means am I mocking her. Since watching her on the Housewives, I have decided that my parents must be forgetting an important detail about our family because I would almost bet my life on Bethenny being our long lost sister. Last night's show proved my point even more! Birthdays for her (and the many other crazy people in this world like me) create way too much anxiety!! So much anxiety that it's so great to know they only come once a year!! Any more than this and I would be locked up in a looney bin "forgetting"I was ever born?! I have had some tear filled birthdays that I could explain but even I wouldn't quite understand what set me off that day. It's usually nothing but EVERYTHING!! When you grow up, not hearing certain key people in your life say Happy Birthday and sincerely mean it, it leaves an impression on you. It leaves this subconscious feeling of disappointment and sadness. Knowing that Bethenny didn't have a great relationship with her father, I can relate to this. Birthdays are supposed to be a special day of happiness and fun but instead that entire day was spent hoping he would call. Hoping he would write you a card. Hoping he would even remember you are his daughter. Due to this anxiety that stems from early childhood, from the moment we start thinking about our birthdays - we end up only concentrating on the negative, toxic facts about our birthdays and then we end up sobbing, angry and hiding in a closet. Believe me - this is how I spent my birthday last year (and all the years prior) - without a dog like Cookie to comfort me. My hubby is so amazing and always here to comfort but doesn't really understand why the one & only "you" day brings such terrible anxiety and fear.

Yep - Happy Birthday. Wake me up tomorrow. 

On a happier note, it's amazing to watch this on television and relate. It's amazing to know - "oh thank god - Someone else freaks out on their birthday too for NO apparent reason!!" It's so comforting to know "oh goody, someone else LIVES in their closet on their birthdays?! No matter how small the gathering - we will always feel anxious. We will always feel like something didn't happen or will happen, so that's why we are always on edge. Strange and sick I know but with time (and closets,) I hope we can all feel happy & special on our birthdays without being Psychotic & Emotional.

What the anxiety and too much attention does to some on their bdays.  Wah.

And on an even HAPPIER note  -  Guess who might be getting her own talk show?! Yes - the Ever After star herself.. Bethenny Frankel!! It's not confirmed just yet but she does have a way with words and makes her viewers feel as though she is somehow a part of them not apart from them. I would definitely tune in!!